The Formula for Happiness

This is a bit of a digression from topics that I normally dwell on in this blog, but I choose to muse nonetheless, dear reader.

I was having a conversation with a close friend of mine who studies psychology (say what you will, but she's actually a nice girl- although, on occasion I do get the urge to wrap my head in lead so that she stops reading my mind).

The topic of conversation was happiness.

Kind of a funny word for something that is so all-consuming in many people's lives. Some people spend their entire life looking for happiness, when they're not even entirely sure what it is that 'happiness' really involves.

Money? Women? Men? Family? Accomplishment? Tradition? Money?

According to my friend, happiness and the things that make people happy can be divided into three spheres. Health, wealth, and relationships (not necessarily the romantic kind, but your relationships in general with other human beings (or cats, if that's your thing).

Thus, we have the formula for happiness.

Health + Wealth + Relationships = Happiness

(although, personally I define it as Mohito + Beach + Scenery = Happiness)

When I started to muse on this little tidbit, it actually does make a lot of sense. When people are ill, they tend to be unhappy. When they're broke and can't pay the bills- stressed. And unhappy. Two hours after a rough breakup? Unhappy (or completely shitfaced).

Now think of a particular time in your life that everything just seemed to click. Odds are that you were in good health, were making enough money to pay the bills, and were getting laid at least somewhat regularly. Or were spending time with a good group of friends frequently enough that your lack of after-dark escapades didn't really matter.

The terms 'health,' 'wealth,' and 'relationships' are subjective. They might mean different things to different people. For instance, 'wealth' does not necessarily have to mean an income of six figures annually. 'Wealth' could be living comfortably in a modest house or apartment. As my future-psychologist friend described it, you are rich in the wealth sphere if you have the means to support a lifestyle which you are content to live.

Personally, being extremely wealthy might seem fantastic, but I don't honestly think that I could spend a million dollars a year on myself and not feel bloated (metaphorically and literally- I have a weakness for Porterhouse).

'Health' is also subjective. For some, the minimum standard of health might be a body chiselled like a Greek God(ess) and the ability to run a three minute mile. For others, 'health' might mean waking up without a migraine or other painful ailment.

'Relationship' is perhaps the most subjective of the three terms. As a culture, we place a lot of importance on the rituals that surround our interaction with other people. Even people who operate on that pretense of not placing importance in the rituals are cognizant of them and subscribe to a ritual of not subscribing to the rituals (ie- self-described 'laid back' people... no offense, dear reader, I'm one of those people).

What are those rituals? In business, a handshake. Traditionally done in meeting, greeting, dealing, and parting (in most of the western world, anyway). Among family and friends, a hug or kiss- again, meeting, greeting, and parting. Among lovers? Other things- I think you can fill in the blanks yourself.

What does the word 'relationship' even mean? It depends on the context. Romantic, platonic, casual. At its simplest, a relationship is the manner in which one person knows and interacts with another person. This is what the third sphere describes. To be happy in the relationship sphere, you don't necessarily have to have massive numbers of adoring friends, or a single adoring romantic partner. Or in the case of some people, a massive number of adoring romantic partners. What the relationship sphere of happiness describes is your personal satisfaction with the interactions that you have with other people. Like the other two spheres, it's different for every person.

This entire post might seem like a massive blonde moment (apologies to any blonde readers without a sense of humour). What I've written does seem very simple, but I think it's a sort of simple that many of us overlook in our daily struggles. Thinking about life and happiness in these terms can give us a new perspective on ourselves and on how we live. And newfound power in coming up with solutions to our problems.

So, how does this relate to image?

Image is a tool for you to use in your daily conquests, whether they relate to health, wealth, or relationships. A positive image will help make colleagues more amenable to you at work. A positive image can increase self-confidence and motivate you to live healthier; whether that image is coming from someone else or from your bathroom mirror. As for relationships- positivity and confidence are universally attractive features, both in romance and in friendship.

Wield it wisely.